Hard to Admit

This is a little hard for me to admit: Yesterday I was a whinner. Okay, I said it and it’s true. I was having myself a private pity party and I’m ashamed of it now in retrospect. Let me explain:

It rained here all day yesterday. With my body, cold and rainy days equal stiff and sore joints. And I babysat my grandson who I dearly love all day kind of unexpectedly. And he was a little, well, a lot, grumpy. I ended up letting him sleep on my lap for about four hours: the problem was I dumbly chose to sit on our chase chair in a 2/3 reclined position with my legs dangling over the too short end. It was his comfort and well being I was thinking of at the time, not ergonomics. So, after he left I was in a lot of pain; my legs barely would work and I ended up in bed very early. But at about midnight I awoke with a stomach ache that kept me up till about 2:30 am. As I drifted off to sleep I was still grumbling about to myself, how I hurt, had missed church, would be tired today, etc.

As I pittied myself I thought of a testimony my friend and brother in Christ had sent me concerning his painful battle with cancer. In his worst times he praised God for whatever he was going through, not complained about it as I was. Then I recalled how dragging my feet through the house was very much like I was when I had to re-learn to walk after my first surgery. How ashmed I felt.

So I say to you now, I’m not complaining about hurting; I can feel the pain now whereas before, when paralyzed, I couldn’t. I’m not complaining about missing church; I’m thankful I have a good church and wonderful church family to go to. I’m not complaining about being tired; I’m glad I can get out on my own and go. I could go on but I think you see my point and my repentant attitude, which I thank God for showing me that I was in need of. And I also better understand what Paul meant when he wrote:

Philippians 4:4 Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, Rejoice.

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